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- Abortion Dialogues in Greater Boston
Abortion Dialogues in Greater Boston
The idea for the Public Conversations Project—the organization that, in 2016, became known as Essential Partners—occurred to Laura R. Chasin while watching a televised debate on abortion.
The moderator’s efforts to facilitate an orderly conversation among two pro-choice and two pro-life advocates had been totally ineffective. Speakers on each side had attacked and counter-attacked, and they had interrupted each other repeatedly to disparage their adversaries.
The moderator lamented, "There's nothing going on here but a lot of noise."
Laura agreed. She mused that she and many of her family therapy colleagues knew how to facilitate constructive exchanges on "hot" conflicts—at least among related individuals—and wondered whether their approaches could be used to help small groups of unrelated citizens.
Could they help people engage in productive conversations about abortion and other divisive public issues?
Laura invited a small group of colleagues at the Family Institute of Cambridge to join her in exploring this possibility. They began by watching videos of political debates and brainstorming ideas about how those conversations might have been more constructive. They drew cautious optimism from their clinical experiences, where couples and family members learned to resist chronic patterns of attack and counter-attack.
In the Spring of 1990, the founders convened small dialogue groups to talk about abortion. These early participants served as collaborators, innovating methods and structures to allow constructive conversations about the divisive issue.
Within eighteen months, they had conducted 18 single-session dialogues. Several participants were activists but, by design, only two were highly visible leaders. All groups were evenly balanced with people who described themselves as "pro-choice" or "pro-life."
By the end of this series of dialogues, the founders had developed and field-tested a reliable model for opening new ways of communicating on this contentious issue.
Tragedy and Transformation
On December 30, 1994, an activist named John Salvi entered two women’s health clinics in Brookline, MA with a gun and opened fire. He murdered two clinic workers. The tragedy drew widespread media attention. Governor Weld and Cardinal Law issued joint calls for common ground talks between activists and an end to inflammatory rhetoric.
At that time, Essential Partners (then the Public Conversations Project) were the only organization with a track record of promoting new kinds of conversations on this issue.
The founders had also maintained good relationships with the sixty participants in their 1990-92 abortion dialogues. This gave them considerable access to, and credibility with, activist networks on both sides of the issue.
Well positioned to build on the fruits of our prior efforts, the founders initiated five streams of activity in the following months:
- A second series of introductory abortion dialogues
- A training program for pro-choice and pro-life facilitation teams
- An ongoing network for "graduates" of the introductory dialogues interested in opportunities for sustained dialogue and collaboration
- A more limited confidential dialogue series involving pro-choice and pro-life activists
- The Abortion Dialogue Handbook (Download our free handbook, Fostering Dialogue Across Divides)
These five activities were strategically linked with the goal of depolarizing the climate surrounding the abortion controversy in the Greater Boston area.
The introductory dialogues served as feeders for the development of the graduate network. The training of bipartisan facilitators expanded the circle of people who had the ability to facilitate these difficult conversations. And the founders began to draft a Handbook that others could use to convene dialogues on abortion in their own communities.
From December 1995 through April 1998, the founders conducted a series of ten single-session dialogues on abortion, each with six participants. Each of the ten sessions was observed by or facilitated by one of three bipartisan facilitation teams trained previously.
This second series of citizen dialogues comprised the grassroots component for a multi-faceted initiative to improve the climate surrounding abortion in the Boston area.
Human Connection Across Fundamental Differences
These dialogues were never intended to change minds. Their intent was to broaden perspectives, deepen understanding, and foster human connections.
The ultimate goal was that no person would ever be harmed by the dehumanizing effects of dysfunctional public discourse.
In follow up calls, participants indicated that the stereotypes they had brought to the dialogue—in some cases unconsciously—had been softened. Many participants explained the ways in which the dialogue had fundamentally altered the way they interacted with people of different perspectives.
Quantitative evaluation of the dialogues indicated that participants came away giving less credibility to the media’s portrayal of people who hold opposing views on abortion.
Working in partnership with a mediator, Susan Podziba and Associates, the founders designed, convened, and facilitated a series of off-the-record meetings with leaders from the pro-choice and pro-life communities. They met at intervals for five years, exploring the many dimensions of division and conflict.
And in the end, the participants co-authored an account of their experience that was published as "Talking with the Enemy" in the January 29, 2001 edition of the Boston Sunday Globe.
The Origins of Essential Partners
The introductory dialogues in both the first and second series were notable for the heartfelt manner in which participants shared their stories and perspectives, the way they listened to each other and expressed curiosity about each other, and the extent to which they reported having been invited into deeper reflection on their own beliefs.
Over the years, the Essential Partners dialogue method developed and changed. Practitioners discovered applications to a broad range of divisive public issues, in a diverse array of communities and organizations, with people from every walk of life. But the underlying mission has remained steadfast.
As Public Conversations was then, Essential Partners today is committed to fostering constructive dialogue where conflicts are driven by differences in identity, beliefs, and values.
Related Impact Stories
Testimonials
Nicki Glasser, Policy CoordinatorWhat surprised me was how much you could transform a relationship during a three-hour conversation.
Transformation Center, Massachusetts
Program ParticipantI am now open to new views and can moderate my impulse to debate or persuade others of different views
Montana
Program ParticipantI am now open to new views and can moderate my impulse to debate or persuade others of different views
Montana
Undergraduate StudentI notice that my classmates take much more care when speaking about people who practice other religions. They make fewer assumptions, and they’re more careful with their words to make sure to avoid unintentional connotations.
Bridgewater College, Virginia
Megan DeFranzaThere is a need not only for safe space within our churches but for our church leaders who often feel alone, or who may feel their job could be at risk if they engage in controversial conversations. How are they to make safe spaces in their own congregations for healthy dialogue if they rarely experience safe space to do the same?
Gordon College, Massachusetts
Nicki Glasser, Policy CoordinatorWhat surprised me was how much you could transform a relationship during a three-hour conversation.
Transformation Center, Massachusetts
Program ParticipantThe highlight for me was the interconnectedness of the participants’ views, mutual respect, and range of experiences within the group
Montana
Program ParticipantI felt an amazing sense of accomplishment when the Essential Partners training ended; that I'd done something important for my community and something important for me.
Massachusetts
Misty Stoll, School Board TrusteeI ran for my local school board in 2018 and was elected. I use the skills in our meetings, whether I’m chairing the meeting or not. This makes the meetings much more productive. We don’t go over the same topics over and over again.
Wyoming
Program ParticipantI felt an amazing sense of accomplishment when the Essential Partners training ended; that I'd done something important for my community and something important for me.
Massachusetts
Bill Scott, Project DirectorThere was a remarkable change in the way we were able to communicate with one another following the facilitated conversations.
Massachusetts Department of Mental Health
Program ParticipantI did not anticipate having as many concrete takeaways as I do. I feel there is an immense practical application.
Etionette Nshirmirimana, Burundian Master TrainerI realized that by using the “dialogue” approach, people could talk of what is deep in their heart, especially things that have harmed them.
Burundi
Douglas Stone, Sheila Heen, and Bruce PattonWe owe a debt of gratitude to Laura Chasin and her collaborators at Essential Partners… From them, we have learned about the transformative power of telling one’s story and speaking to the heart of the matter.
Difficult Conversations
Linda Gryczan, MediatorInstead of demonizing and dehumanizing the other, we built a deeper connection. The fact that we disagree matters much less. It matters much more that we are neighbors in this community.
Montana Mediation Association
Cricket Fuller, The Christian Science MonitorThis wasn’t a policy debate [about guns]. Instead, two people whose backgrounds and views diverged in almost every way possible shared a moment of honesty that struck at the heart of the matter.
Boston, Massachusetts
Undergraduate StudentI have never heard people talk so openly about race, especially in a class setting. Everyone was respectful and honest at the same time. The dialogue structure helped me learn about my peers and helped me feel more comfortable than I ever have about discussing controversial issues.
Gordon College, Massachusetts
Program ParticipantThis is a new idea, so many people speaking from their hearts. People can come together...if people can understand, they can change their hearts; then this can bring about more change.
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Belle AbayaAuthentic conversations will lead people to reflect on their own thinking and transform their perspectives to include that of others.
The Conflict Resolution Group Foundation, Philippines
Paul Schupe, Hancock United Church of ChristIt’s amazing how closely we can work together on certain projects and never know what about our faith motivates our work. This work deepened my appreciation for everyone who was there; hearing everyone's stories helped me to appreciate them more and the depth of their convictions, even when they’re convictions I don’t share.
Lexington, Massachusetts
Program ParticipantThis is a different tool for engagement. It’s not about you, it’s about others. It involves the art of listening and sincerely talking from the heart
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Bob Bordone, Expert and AuthorEssential Partners does the best work in the field of dialogue and communication.
Harvard Negotiation & Mediation Clinical Program, Co-Founder
Misty Stoll, School Board TrusteeThe Sheridan Community has changed in the best way since the Essential Partners training. The Center for a Vital Community has been holding monthly dialogues. I’m going to facilitate the upcoming one. What’s great is that we’re attracting a much more diverse group of participants. There are always the regulars who come, but now we’re also getting conservative Republicans to come as well—politicians come, even the Sheriff comes.
Wyoming
Matthew Sandikie, Project PartnerThis has been quite different from other discussions in Liberia about peace. While many processes have been about how to reform ex-combatants, this was about how we may hold our own views but live together peacefully.
Liberia
Romeo McCauley, Project PartnerI learned that I can build relationships, that I can be connected to anybody who I want to be connected to, no matter how difficult it is
Liberia
Kim Davidson, OmbudsI’ve gained not only confidence but tools. The Essential Partners training was worth every penny.
Oberlin College, Ohio
Veronique Cavaillier, Director of Eastern Trade CouncilI think Essential Partners' training should be mandatory in every legislature. I think it should be a requirement.
The Council of State Governments
Program ParticipantI read this comment from the 14th Dalai Lama: "Every change of mind is first of all a change of heart.” It seems appropriate for what we are doing.
Bayview, Michigan
Louise O’Kane, Community Places[Essential Partners’] technique is used to explore contentious or divisive issues. So looking at renewable energy we thought this was an ideal opportunity to explore all the complexities of that issue. I found it a really useful method, and although this is the first time we’ve used it I am sure we’ll be using it again.
Northern Ireland, UK
Lauren Cobb, Task Force MemberI now lead teams with a different language, using different processes, and with a different awareness of team dynamics. [I’ve seen] relationships grow and deepen, unity and commitment remain high, and mutual respect established and fostered.
Glendale Presbyterian Church, California
Imam Sani IsahThrough this training, we will have more people in the stream of work that we do and become better equipped with the know-how, skills and techniques. But most important, together we will sow a seed that will germinate and become a source of the antidote to terrorism, fanaticism, bigotry and extremism.
Nigeria
Program ParticipantThis is the best adult learning experience I have had in the past five years. I wanted to learn new skills—I did!
Program ParticipantThis is a different tool for engagement. It’s not about you, it’s about others. It involves the art of listening and sincerely talking from the heart
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Windor DorkoAs a former rebel, I really believe that if we had known about dialogue, perhaps we would not have had a civil war.
Liberia
Undergraduate StudentI notice that my classmates take much more care when speaking about people who practice other religions. They make fewer assumptions, and they’re more careful with their words to make sure to avoid unintentional connotations.
Bridgewater College, Virginia
Program ParticipantThis is a new idea, so many people speaking from their hearts. People can come together...if people can understand, they can change their hearts; then this can bring about more change.
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Janet Harris, Winthrop Rockefeller InstituteThe learning we received from Essential Partners has helped us open up space for people to have difficult conversations in a different way. The more we do this, the more we realize that dialogue has to be a part of all our work.
Arkansas
Belle AbayaTogether, we married our ideas to create a dialogue model that took into consideration our young people’s particular needs, and our culture.
The Conflict Resolution Group Foundation, Philippines
Seth Karamage, MediatorI am amazed at what came out—the way people shared their stories. This is not like a role-play; it really touched me.
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Program ParticipantThis is the best adult learning experience I have had in the past five years. I wanted to learn new skills—I did!
Bob Bordone, Expert and AuthorEssential Partners does the best work in the field of dialogue and communication.
Harvard Negotiation & Mediation Clinical Program, Co-Founder
Megan DeFranzaHere safe space was created for pastors and church leaders to wrestle with topics like evolution which are all too often “off limits” or believed to be antagonistic to the faith.
Gordon College, Massachusetts
Kate CellThe thing that always feels like magic to me—and I’ve used it in several meetings that I’ve had since—is how the practitioners start by setting out pacts or agreements.
Union of Concerned Scientists, Massachusetts
Imam Sani IsahThrough this training, we will have more people in the stream of work that we do and become better equipped with the know-how, skills and techniques. But most important, together we will sow a seed that will germinate and become a source of the antidote to terrorism, fanaticism, bigotry and extremism.
Nigeria
Cricket Fuller, The Christian Science MonitorThis wasn’t a policy debate [about guns]. Instead, two people whose backgrounds and views diverged in almost every way possible shared a moment of honesty that struck at the heart of the matter.
Boston, Massachusetts
Program ParticipantThe highlight for me was the interconnectedness of the participants’ views, mutual respect, and range of experiences within the group
Montana
Program ParticipantI read this comment from the 14th Dalai Lama: "Every change of mind is first of all a change of heart.” It seems appropriate for what we are doing.
Bayview, Michigan
Linda Gryczan, MediatorInstead of demonizing and dehumanizing the other, we built a deeper connection. The fact that we disagree matters much less. It matters much more that we are neighbors in this community.
Montana Mediation Association
Peter Cooke, Immigration Dialogue ParticipantThere’s a real difference to people who are coming to meetings. They say, wow this is so different. They all said how people were more on the ball, more congenial. Now people see growing the economy as a way to unify the receiving community and immigrant communities.
New Hampshire
Program ParticipantBefore, I thought all dialogue that does not culminate in solution was considered equivalent to failure. Now I see that dialogue is a stage complete in itself.
Burundi
Program ParticipantWhile our differences remain, the relationships between us have been strengthened and deepened. We have gained in mutual respect, affection, and appreciation of one another as followers of Jesus and fellow-bishops.
Anglican Community & Human Sexuality Retreat
Kim Davidson, OmbudsI’ve gained not only confidence but tools. The Essential Partners training was worth every penny.
Oberlin College, Ohio
Member of the CongregationI cannot possibly walk out of this experience and help being a different person. I feel that my own experience has been life-changing.
Glendale Presbyterian, California
Seth Karamage, MediatorI am amazed at what came out—the way people shared their stories. This is not like a role-play; it really touched me.
Interfaith Mediation Centre, Nigeria
Gail AndersonWe became confident really early on that the model was working. We were nervous there would be yelling and blow-ups but after a few conversations we realized that wasn’t happening… People were treating each other humanely.
Minnesota Council of Churches
Program ParticipantThere should be opportunities throughout the [Anglican] Communion for ongoing structured conversations regarding difficult issues. These should engage persons at all levels within and between Provinces and should be guided by agreed covenants similar to those that have assisted our conversations.
Anglican Community & Human Sexuality Retreat
Program ParticipantI did not anticipate having as many concrete takeaways as I do. I feel there is an immense practical application.
Belle AbayaWhat is special about Essential Partners' approach is that it promotes authenticity, reduces defensiveness, increases curiosity, and boosts connectedness.
The Conflict Resolution Group Foundation, Philippines